where i am now

the past few days, i have been missing out on writing. i dunno why. sometimes, i really don't have anything interesting to say.

not that many interesting things happening so far. except that i'm getting lost. or maybe i'm just really finding out who i am. or discovering things about me i didn't know before. quite discomforting. some of these situations. i've never been in them before. never thought i'd be in them at all. just never thought about it at all. now, i'm in them and it's ..different.

was initially curious that's why i pursued some of them. found them interesting at the start. now, i'm just confused since everything's like a spiral. it doesn't seem to have an end. sometimes i think they're all connected. or maybe the situations are just the same. at any rate, i'm getting confused with all of it.

human interaction. emotion. feedback. reaction. perception. priorities. the real things. the simple things. quite confusing. really don't know what actually matters.

sometimes, i stop. just to look where everything really is. but everything seems jumbled up. sometimes i think i may be ignoring the things which are really important. but on the other hand, sometimes i'm thinking i may be learning some things more important.

even my phrases are confusing.